I thought this an appropriate topic for a blog post since we are already in the holiday season, with Thanksgiving recently passed.

It is still a time when much is changing for many of us, and change remains a double edged sword: on one hand it can usher in new and exciting opportunities; on the other hand it sometimes involves the loss of things we like and have grown accustomed to, thus generating fear.

One thing is for certain in this holiday season, or in any other season for that matter: we all have so much to give thanks for. It doesn't matter if we are rich or poor, old or young, challenged with any number of issues. It is a privilege to be human and alive on this planet. Whenever our so-called problems weigh us down, we need only pause a few minutes -or longer- to realize the truth of this.

I recently read a novel that took place in the period prior to, during, and after WWI in Germany. It was about a girl orphaned at a very young age in Berlin, how she was passed from foster home to orphanage, to living on her own, all at very tender ages with absolutely no support system. The things she needed to do to survive were pretty amazing, even by today's standards. And the backdrop of the story was the deteriorating political system in Germany after WWI, where hyper-inflation just about wiped out the middle class and created perpetual hunger for many, where cardboard shoes were the fashion of the moment.

What was really interesting about the story, besides the plight of this young woman thrust into unbelievably uncertain times, was the character of not just her but her friends: they were too busy surviving to complain about anything. And of course, none of these characters had retirement funds or owned homes that had diminished in value; those were things way beyond the scope of their reasonable expectations.

What can we learn from a novel like this? We are an incredibly lucky group of people living in the United States at this moment, even with the economic gyrations taking place around us. And we have many, many, reasons to give thanks.

And we have many, many, reasons to give thanks.

Happy holidays everyone.
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I have been aware for quite some time that the pressure to hurry through every activity is overwhelming today. This "hurry up" attitude puts an extra layer of stress onto everything and everybody; it permeates all parts of society.

It should be obvious that this pressure to hurry has been increased due to the internet, text messages, emails, and the increased speed of just about every form of communication, except for traditional United States Mail. It is so easy to go on the internet at home or on our phones, delete an email in a second, or click through purchases - or people- we don't find particularly attractive. I have been watching how this attitude affects our relationships, and everything else that we do.

In the distant past - that's about ten years ago these days - I rushed through things I labeled as unpleasant, or bad. I would definitely put final exams in law school in that category, or some visits to the dentist, or certain social obligations with people I wasn't all that fond of.

All that has changed today. When I started to observe the things I was rushing through, I noticed there were almost no exceptions. I observed I was less likely to rush when the activity did not involve another person; I had more control over the time spent. I decided to stop hurrying, and start enjoying the moments of almost every activity. Here are some things you can do to slow down, and not hurry through everything:

1. Take a few breaths and relax. Look around and appreciate what you have right now. If you can, watch an animal go through any activity and just observe.
2. Write down six things missing in your life you think you need to be happy.
3. For each thing missing, try and write a few sentences on why you need it.
4. If you can't explain why you need any one thing, cross it off your list; you will probably be left with two or three items.
5. Consider that though these items may still be important, you might be deluding yourself; once you achieve these items a whole new set of "needs" will surface.
6. Realize that even if those remaining items are important to your happiness, there is no reason to sacrifice your present happiness or peace of mind to achieve them.
7. Give yourself permission to just slow down and enjoy your life. It is as simple as that.

Try these steps if you like, and see if you can't savor more of your present moments
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If there is anything I have learned from my interest in energy it is this- many things are able to co-exist simultaneously. And very often the things that exist side by side are polar opposites, or are hard to explain.

I first noticed this several years ago while eating in one of my favorite Italian restaurants. This is a "family style" Italian restaurant located in Queens, near Kennedy airport.
This restaurant has been around forever, and I can remember many family dinners of culinary contentment spent there. Think dishes like baked clams, chicken scapariella, peppers and onions, spaghetti with clam sauce, house red wine, and you have the picture. But there was one factor that always puzzled me: In an otherwise fantastic meal of authentic Italian comfort food, why was the bread so ordinary? How could the owners NOT know this? I received my answer a few years ago, and I never would have been able to figure it out. This restaurant gets its bread from the widow of one of the former owners. Even though the owners know the bread could be better, they stick with this agreement, and the results: mediocre bread in an otherwise great restaurant.

I've noticed this factor at work in friendships and other personal relationships too. When we allow ourselves to open up and get close to someone, we can experience all kinds of pleasures: physical intimacy, emotional harmony, intellectual stimulation, etc. These experiences compose some of the basic benefits we can enjoy as human beings, and they should be celebrated. And we stick with these relationships and allow our vulnerability to continue because of the warm feelings these experiences generate. Those same relationships that engender such positive feelings in us can also morph into the source of the most pain. And the transformation can come in an instant. It's as if these same feelings-pleasure and pain- existed simultaneously on a certain plane. And by a single gesture, or on their own, these feelings can change right before our eyes. And there is almost nothing we can do about these changes-except to accept them and act accordingly.

The same thing can be true for our investments and our work life. We can be in a great situation at work where opportunities are coming our way, a supportive environment exists, and we feel happy to go to work every day. And then something happens...but that something was also present when we thought everything was "fine." But we weren't aware of it; even though on some level it existed at the same time as our "happiness."

It can be very helpful to acknowledge that seemingly "opposite" situations can exist simultaneously. We are less surprised when things flip, and with practice, we might even be able to head them off with our own actions.
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There are many different components to being human, such as the physical body, the mind and the spirit.

When one thinks about aging, it is rarely with the idea that some forms of aging may be optional. If you believe we are more than just the physical body, then this concept begins to make sense. If the spirit exists(and I believe it does), it is ageless on a certain level. The same thing holds true for the mind, if it is properly maintained. The more interesting question arises with the physical body. How do our belief systems influence the appearance of our body, if at all? This is a thorny question, and the purpose of this post is not necessarily to discover the fountain of youth. But assume for a moment that we could achieve a mindset devoid of most fear, devoid of envy, devoid of need, and we are able to access this energy for more than a few seconds. How could this state of calm and peacefulness not impact our physical body in a positive sense?

This budding theory of mine would be hard to prove on a "scientific" basis, because good luck collecting enough human beings who are aware enough to maintain this type of energy for sufficient time. These are things I have observed and felt on a certain level, and I thought would be interesting to put out there for consideration. If anyone reading this post has been able to access this energy and believes to have had some interesting results, I would love to hear about it!

Even if you do not share the belief that there is more to humans than just the physical body, you may have experienced attitudes that you considered "old." When people explain things away by saying "this will never change," it's always been this way," "those people(insert any ethnic group) always spoil things or are no good," I associate these beliefs with being old in the real sense. Anything that promotes an encrusted way of looking at things or suggests a hateful approach to any group or individual seems "old" to me, because it promotes a way of thinking that blocks energy. And isn't keeping the energy flowing the real secret to staying young?
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